Wrapping Presents with a Cat

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by tansy, Dec 4, 2007.

  1. tansy

    tansy New Member

    Clear large space on table for wrapping present.

    Go to closet and collect bag in which present is contained, and shut door.

    Open door and remove cat from closet.

    Go to cupboard and retrieve rolls of wrapping paper.

    Go back and remove cat from cupboard.

    Go to drawer, and collect transparent sticky tape, ribbons, scissors, labels, etc. . .

    Lay out presents and wrapping materials on table, to enable wrapping strategy to be formed.

    Go back to drawer to get string, remove cat that has been in the drawer since last visit and collect string.

    Remove present from bag.

    Remove cat from bag.

    Open box to check present, remove cat from box, replace present.

    Lay out paper to enable cutting to size.

    Try and smooth out paper, realize cat is underneath and remove cat.

    Cut the paper to size, keeping the cutting line straight.

    Throw away first sheet as cat chased the scissors, and tore the paper.

    Cut second sheet of paper to size - by putting cat in the bag the present came in.

    Place present on paper.

    Lift up edges of paper to seal in present. Wonder why edges don't reach. Realize cat is between present and paper. Remove cat.

    Place object on paper, to hold in place while tearing transparent sticky tape.

    Spend 20 minutes carefully trying to remove transparent sticky tape from cat with pair of nail scissors.

    Seal paper with sticky tape, making corners as neat as possible.

    Look for roll of ribbon. Chase cat down hall in order to retrieve ribbon.

    Try to wrap present with ribbon in a two-directional turn.

    Re-roll ribbon and remove paper, which is now torn due to cat's enthusiastic ribbon chase.

    Repeat steps 13-20 until you reach last sheet of paper.

    Decide to skip steps 13-17 in order to save time and reduce risk of losing last sheet of paper. Retrieve old cardboard box that is the right size for sheet of paper.

    Put present in box, and tie down with string.

    Remove string, open box and remove cat.

    Put all packing materials in bag with present and head for locked room.

    Once inside lockable room, lock door and start to relay out paper and materials.

    Remove cat from box, unlock door, put cat outside door, close and relock.

    Repeat previous step as often as is necessary (until you can hear cat from outside door)

    Lay out last sheet of paper. (This will be difficult in the small area of the toilet, but do your best)

    Discover cat has already torn paper. Unlock door go out and hunt through various cupboards, looking for sheet of last year's paper. Remember that you haven't got any left because cat helped with this last year as well.

    Return to lockable room, lock door, and sit on toilet and try to make torn sheet of paper look presentable.

    Seal box, wrap with paper and repair by very carefully sealing with sticky tape. Tie up with ribbon and decorate with bows to hide worst areas.

    Label. Sit back and admire your handiwork, congratulate yourself on completing a difficult job.

    Unlock door, and go to kitchen to make drink and feed cat.

    Spend 15 minutes looking for cat until coming to obvious conclusion.

    Unwrap present, untie box and remove cat.

    Go to store and buy a gift bag
  2. tansy

    tansy New Member

    1. Gather presents, boxes, paper, etc. in middle of living room floor.

    2. Get tape back from puppy.

    3. Remove scissors from older dog's mouth.

    4. Open box.

    5. Take puppy out of box.

    6. Remove tape from older dog's mouth.

    7. Take scissors away from puppy.

    8. Put present in box.

    9. Remove present from puppy's mouth.

    10. Put back in box after removing puppy from box.

    11. Take scissors from older dog and sit on them.

    12. Remove puppy from box and put on lid.

    13. Take tape away from older dog.

    14. Unroll paper.
    15. Take puppy OFF box.

    16. Cut paper being careful not to cut puppy's foot or nose that is getting in the way as he "helps."

    17. Let puppy tear remaining paper.

    18. Take puppy off box.
    19. Wrap paper around box.

    20. Remove puppy from box & take wrapping paper from its mouth.

    21. Tell older dog to fetch the tape so he will stop stealing it.

    22. Take scissors away from puppy.

    23. Take tape older dog is holding.

    24. Quickly tape one spot before taking scissors from older dog & sitting on them again.

    25. Fend off puppy trying to steal tape & tape another spot.

    26. Take bow from older dog.

    27. Go get roll of wrapping paper puppy ran off with.

    28. Take scissors from older dog who took them when you got up.

    29. Give pen to older dog to hold so he stops licking your face.

    30. Remove puppy from present & hurriedly slap tape on to hold the paper on.

    31. Take now soggy bow from puppy & tape on since the sticky stuff no longer sticks.

    32. Take pen from older dog, address tag & affix while puppy tries to eat pen.

    33. Grab present before puppy opens it & put it away.

    34. Clean up mess puppy & older dog made playing tug-of-war with remnants of wrapping paper.

    35. Put away rest of wrapping supplies & tell dogs what good helpers they are.
  3. fivesue

    fivesue New Member

    That is hilarious, Tansy! So true. Made may night.

    Thank you so for posting it.

  4. Christinawensell

    Christinawensell New Member

    My daughter put up our Christmas tree and had it perfect, called me in I saw it turned around went into bedroom and then heard a big crash. Ran in the other room. My was in a mess of broken glass balls for the tree She had to take another hour to redecorate a tree she just took two hours on. We ended up moving it in another room, because the room it was in is all tile and the balls did not have a chance. It now is where carpet is. The cat has left it alone so far, but we ended up having to go to the dollar store and buy plastic (smart idea) balls and put them on.

    Merry Christmas to you and your pets.

  5. tansy

    tansy New Member

    they were sisters and partners in crime. So I had a chuckle when I saw this; and as for the trees and house decorations - as far as the cats were concerned Christmas was Playtime.

    The dog we had prior to these siamese sisters was a lot less work at Christmas time.

    TC, Tansy
  6. mezombie

    mezombie Member

    I loved the cat one, Tansy.

    I'm seriously considering not putting up a tree this year because I don't think I have the energy to deal with what my two cats will do to it.

    One of them has discovered a new hobby: Shredding one of my lampshades. She jumped into an empty cardbox after I chased her away. Maybe she wanted to be somebody's present! All it would have taken is some tape to close the box, a few airholes...

    Oh, I am baaaad.


    Your Zombie
  7. boltchik

    boltchik New Member

    Lol! Lol! My husband and I just read the cat story and laughed so hard! This is our first year with a kitten. She is about 8 months old and I was going to post asking any cat owners for suggestions in keeping the cat away from the tree. Hmmmm......from the looks of the posts I have read so far, it is next to impossible!

    Cats just love to get up in everyone's business! She is so much fun though. I just pray that I do not come home to a knocked over tree! Hugs, Kim :)
  8. Rosiebud

    Rosiebud New Member

    just like my two kitties, into everything and more.

    Thanks for the laugh

  9. morningsonshine

    morningsonshine New Member

    Do you own my cat's twin??
    I can see a kids picture book to go along with your words!

    Just as bad is Knitting with the Cat!! Finding your yarn suddenly ends because kitty chewed it in half! LOL