yet more email funnies, cell phone DO NOT CALL list

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Catseye, Feb 23, 2007.

  1. Catseye

    Catseye Member

    A little boy went up to his father and asked: "Dad, where did
    all of my intelligence come from?" The father replied. "Well son, you
    must have got it from your mother, cause I still have mine"

    Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the
    divorce Court Judge said, "And I've decided to give your wife $775 a
    week," "That's very fair, your honor," the husband said. "And every now
    and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself,"

    A doctor examined a woman, took the husband aside, and said, "I
    don't like the looks of your wife at all," "Me neither doc," said the
    husband. "But she's a great cook and really good with the kids.

    An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a
    curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says,
    "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to
    put the curse on you. The old man says without hesitation, "I now
    pronounce you man and wife."

    Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder

    1. All the DNA is the same.
    2. There are no dental records.

    A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell me how
    long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City ?" The agent
    replies, "Just a minute..." "Thank you," the blonde says, and hangs

    Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan
    Gonzalez. "How was he killed?" asked one detective. "With a golf gun,"
    the other detective replied. "A golf gun?! What is a golf gun?" "I
    don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.

    This guy has been sitting in a bar all night, staring at a
    blonde wearing the tightest pants he's ever seen. Finally his curiosity
    gets the best of him, so he walks over and asks, "How do you get into
    those pants?" The young woman looks him over and replies, "Well, you
    could start by buying me a drink."

    While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a
    display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty
    pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my
    husband's advice. "What do you think?" I asked. "Should I get a bikini
    or an all-in-one?" "Better get a bikini," he replied. "You'd never get
    it all in one."

    Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old granddaughter and beeped
    the horn by mistake. She turned and looked at him for an explanation He
    said, "I did that by accident." She replied, "I know that, Grandpa." He
    replied, "How did you know?" She said, "Because you didn't say
    "*******" afterwards".


    I got this email, too, about cell phones. I don't have that problem now since I'm far away from the US and I have no idea how accurate this is; for all I know it's a prank. But maybe someone could look into it or knows about it. I remember getting a few solicitation calls on my cells a couple of years ago. So it seems it could get worse at some point. Anyway, this is what was passed on to me:

    REMINDER....12 days from today, all cell phone numbers are being released to telemarketing companies and you will start to receive sale calls.
    To prevent this, call the following number from your cell phone:1-888-382-1222.
    It is the National DO NOT CALL list. It will only take a minute of your time.
    It blocks your number for five (5) years.
    You must call from the cell phone number you want to have blocked.
    You cannot call from a different phone number.
    It take about 20 seconds.

    Just thought it may be of some interest.


  2. larryh

    larryh New Member

    thanks for the funnies, but the cell phone thing is a hoax.

  3. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    the phone number, Karen. I've had that number twice. I always lose it before I call.

    This time I called.

  4. JLH

    JLH New Member

    Loved the jokes!
  5. sues1

    sues1 New Member

    I enjoyed them and needed a grin and a giggle.

    Love, Susan