You are my angels

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by hartogold, Oct 26, 2005.

  1. hartogold

    hartogold New Member

    To those I you who responded to my earlier post...

    God bless you all and thank you for you love and support. Also I'm glad you enjoyed my photography. It's one thing that does bring joy into my life and hopefully the lives of others. When I don't feel like taking pictures I KNOW something's not right.

    A lot has happened since my post this afternoon and I had to share it with you.

    I'm a member of AA. I was sober for 11 years and started drinking again in 1999. I started AA again 9/1 of this year. I know I was self-medicating now...not just for pain, but because of my bi-polar stuff too. I was planning on attending a meeting tonight, one that I've never attended. I spent two hours cooking a casserole to share as it was a pot luck meeting. I really wasn't in the mood to be around people and pretend like I was ok when I wasn't.

    I forced myself to go anyway. When I got there, I didn't know anyone and I found out that most of the people there were drug addicts who were only there because they were court mandated. I was the only one out of the 20+ people there that brought a dish to share. I had no appetite, so I decided to go for a walk while people ate and talked. I got back in time for the meeting and as I sat there watching people screw around I felt a panic attack coming on. My casserole was eaten. So I took that as a sign from God that it was ok for me to grab my empty dish and leave.

    I cried all the way home out of guilt, frustration, sadness and kinda proud of myself for following my heart and doing what was best for me at the time.

    When I got home I immediately came here and I have been balling ever since...tears of joy and love. You ALL knew EXACTLY what I needed to hear and more. How blessed I am to have the wonderful angels I have in my life here, and here is just where I needed to be. There is nothing that takes your mind off of physical and emotional pain than feeling loved and understood.

    Thank you so much. I can only pray that I have helped and will be able to give back what all of you have given me.

    Yep, I think I'll hang out here tonight..where I feel, safe, accepted, loved and empathy. Again...God bless you all.

    PS. For those of you who would like info on how to get prints framed or not, I will be happy to email you the information. Webshots doesn't allow people to print off of their site. I'm honored that so many of you showed interest and enjoyed the beauty I see through my lense.
  2. elsa

    elsa New Member

    Bless you Dear .. You live up to your user name and then some! Good for you for going back ... sober since 9/1 ! You go girl!! One foot in front of the other.

    Anyone with a soul like yours is going to be just fine. You hang here all you need to and keep getting stronger.

    Take care,


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