You Know, I Feel Awful Tonight

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by NyroFan, Aug 19, 2006.

  1. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    I have been answering posts, but realized I said nothing much about the way I feel.

    I am anxious. It must be all the doctor appointments or just me making mountains out of molehills.

    Usually content with my life, I have a real restlessness tonight.

    I think that going to all the docs in two weeks is making me buggy. It brings me back to reality. Geez, I really am that sick!

    I thought I had acceptance, but whenever I go to these appointments I get all keyed up.

    I should probably break up the appointments over a month or so.

    I do not need to be reminded that I need another endoscope, colon check, breast exam, discussion as to whether the gallstones or gallbladder should be taken out..and hey---what about that hypothyroidism that they seem so fasinated with: now a biopsy?

    It is an overload. I made it through three appointments so far. Now I have the PCP again, the Urologist (system is messed up-- got his card in the mail for it.

    I feel like h*ll tonight. I just want things to go back to being peaceful in my usual routine.

    Isn't it nice when a cab driver shows up and asks YOU to give directions because he does not know the area?

    And then I go through: will the cab show up, how long should I wait and on and on and on and on. Yes, must be the pity pot.

    Well, I will now get off of it and take the bull by the horns (no, not a doctor...) and get an attitude adjustment.

    I have to work on gratitude tonght. Inspirational reading should do it. I will have to talk myself down because these doctors appointments just mirror how bad off I am.

    well, that is off of my chest. thanks for listening. if you

  2. JewelRA

    JewelRA New Member

    I am so sorry sweetie. You do seem to be having a hard time today. (I just responded to your other post about angina. Thank you for responding to my post BTW!)

    Anyway, I can totally relate. I've felt like heck the past couple of months and can't seem to shake it. This summer I've had a TON of doctor appointment and dentist appointment, and that seemed to make things worse for me too! I can't tell you how many I called and rescheduled on because I just dreaded them so much and/or was having panic attacks and couldn't make it up to the office! I generally do think it's a good idea to space them out if at all possible.

    Try to relax and do something nice for yourself tonight. Take a hot bath, do some inspirational reading like you said, whatever makes you feel good. I pray you feel better soon.
  3. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member


    You are a gem.

  4. Lolalee

    Lolalee New Member

    You have every right to feel anxious and awful about these things. Poor sweetie, I wish I could give you a big hug. Ok, since I can't be there to do that, this is what I'll do. nyrofan, I'm going to share a card that I received from a sweet friend today. Here goes....

    Thinking Caring Thoughts of You (picture a lovely blue pond surrounded by flowers and a beautiful tree...a rainbow in the distance)

    Sometimes when you don't feel so good or things don't go just as they's nice to think about lovely things - like a garden alive with butterfly wings....Or a rainbow's promise after the rain and the morning's glow on your windowpane....

    Remember the people who can't do without you, the friends who always are thinking about you...For when you are happy, it cheers those who love you.

    Simply because they think the world of you !!!!

    Love from your friend,


    I hope this card cheered you as it did me when I received it today.
  5. 1sweetie

    1sweetie New Member

    I relate too. I'm tired of appointments and do better when there are NONE scheduled. It seems to get so complicated when you have appointments. I get very anxious.

    Can you spread them out and make them for the part of day that is best for you? Remember we have an energy envelope and pacing is our friend.

    I have learned the hard way...several times in fact.LOL If I remember, I am not going to do that again.

    Take care and I'm glad that you have found something that helps with your anxiety. I need to follow in your foot steps.
  6. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member


    thank you for the beautiful card. I can envision it. Nice thoughts.

    Sweetie: yes, my mistake for making these appointments so close together. I tend to do things in a whirlwind when it comes to that. No more, not based on how I am feeling.

    I think it is because I know something is wrong and these just will not be regualar visits.

    Are there any more polyps. Are you ready for another endo?
    How about that colonoscopy? Chest pain? Out comes the nurse with the EKG. Twitching: the neuro raised the Klonopin and my anxiety with it.......and on it goes.

    I do not know what I would do with you. I was a little hesitant when I joined the board way back when, but since my trust level has been good: you always make me feel better.

    thanks seems so simple to say.......

  7. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member


    My neigbor across the street had a kidney stone work its way down and she came screaming over to my house--directly across.

    Nobody home but her. So, against the law (seizures, can't drive) I drove her to the hospital. Yes, the kidney stones and only one made it out.

    The x-rays showed there was one more.

    So, I drove her home and thought: we have not spoken in over a year just because we don't for no partiuclar reason and here I was in the ER with her.


  8. caperkat

    caperkat New Member

  9. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    i have to still get my lab work done from june appt...i left out and either he took off w/my lab work or i left it in the room...

    i just get sick and tired of having to fight the fight to get some relief...

    so i will just not go...i do the important things...but i get tired of just ice it down and don't use..

    frick i wouldn't be able to accomplish a darn thing if i can't use my bad uppper body and hands and the right elbow...

    i can't afford a house cleaner...i am right handed...and who is going to clean me up...?not my 16 year old son...i wouldn't even want my daughter too, if i had one...


  10. Lendy5

    Lendy5 New Member

    I understand completely how you feel. I have felt bad all evening, and it seems my arms and legs are hurting worse lately.

    There are so many appointments I have to go to and it's all so overwhelming.....PCP, Neurologist, OB Visit and I am dreading seeing my GI doctor because he wants me to have surgery for my acid reflux.

    It's so nice to come here and get love and support from everyone that understands.

    You are in my thoughts and prayers.....Love & Hugs!

    Hope you feel better soon.....carolin
  11. PVLady

    PVLady New Member

    I'm sorry you are going through all this... I could have written your post. I hate the appointments.

    I am also going through tests and feel upset. It seems like I have a appointment every day. Next week is abdominal CT Scan with contrast and MRI or shoulder.

    I also have gallstones and have a problem with lack of appetite and weight loss. I try not to worry but it is hard.

    So far most my tests are ok. My mammogram was normal, thank goodness!

    I am also supposed to have my gallbladder removed. The doctors are thinking maybe my digestive problems are caused by the gallstones.

    I've been reading possible side effects after having your gallbladder removed, sometimes bad diarrhea. That is not something I want to have!!

    However, if I don't have the gallbladder out, I could wind up with painful attacks.

    I have been praying alot lately. Husband has back surgery in April with complications. He is ok now but it has been hard.

    I also had a endoscopy last week. It wasn't bad at all.

    I understand how you can feel anxious, I am the same way. I hope all turns out fine for you.

    Take care..


    You are always there when we need you! I sure hope you feel better and I will pray for peace for you and everything will be fine!!

  13. gnanny

    gnanny New Member

    It can be so overwhelming to have so much looming on your 'to do' list.

    I tend to go deep into denial when too much piles up at once.

    Appointments, procedures, surgeries, tests, I dont know where to begin so I do nothing.

    I just cant think about it....denial or self preservation?

    I wouldnt think you were making mountains out of molehills. You have some legitimate concerns. You have a great attitude just knowing you can adjust your attitude! I hope you can find some peace of mind...then you will be able to tackle what needs to be done.

    One day at a time my friend
  14. littlebrownwren

    littlebrownwren New Member

    I'm so sorry you're having one of those awful days.

    I also hate the appointments.

    When I have an appt. coming up it seems like a dark cloud is hanging over my head. You would think I was going to my death. My muscles are tight and if I happen to look pass a mirror, my mouth is drawn and I have my lips pressed tight together.

    The minute I'm out of that office, I feel pounds lighter.

    My daughter , bless her heart, says mom, it's ok, you can breathe now. She's right. LOL


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