"Sick Notes" (hilarious school absence excuses) | ProHealth Fibromyalgia, ME/CFS and Lyme Disease Forums

"Sick Notes" (hilarious school absence excuses)

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Sick Notes

These are real notes written by parents in a Tennessee school district...(spellings have been left intact.)

1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take PE today. Please execute him.

2. Please exkuce lisa for being absent she was sick and i had her shot.

3. Dear school: please ecsc's john being absent on jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 and also 33.

4. Please excuse gloria from jim today. She is administrating.

5. Please excuse roland from p.e. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.

6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

7. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.

8. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.

9. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.

10. Please excuse ray friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

11. Please excuse pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre, dyrea, direathe), the sh**s. [note: words in ( )'s were crossed out] .

12. Please excuse tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea, and his boots leak.

13. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.

14. Please excuse jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.

15. I kept billie home because she had to go christmas shopping because i don't know what size she wear.

16. Please excuse jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it monday. We thought it was sunday.

17. Sally won't be in school a week from friday. We have to attend her funeral.

18. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the marines.

19. Ple ase excuse jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.

20. Please excuse mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

21. Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.

22. Please excuse brenda. She has been sick and under the doctor.

23. Maryann was absent december 11-16, because she had a fever,sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick,fever an sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.

[This Message was Edited on 08/03/2007]


New Member
me and my husband, Tom, are sitting here with tears running down our faces, I am sore with laughing.

Going to post this to friends.

Thanks for the great laugh Rafiki.



New Member
However, it does call for some concern, sounds like mom and/or dad need to go back to school! Or little Sally and Billy are writting their own notes,lol. Thanks for laughs-Carla


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but just thinking about them today makes me laugh all over again!

I'm a big believer in the power of the belly laugh (I'd love to do laughter Yoga!) and this did it for me. I'm so glad it did it for some others, too!

Peace out,

PS, I'm laughing so hard the laptop is bouncing up and down! ohdear!


New Member
of the time my brother skipped school and had a neighbor lady write his excuse...

she spelled diarrhea wrong, which would have been fine, except he forgot to take it out of his jeans pocket and mom found it.

She was the daughter of a school teacher and a very good speller.

She was not a happy camper and he never pulled that trick again.

Thanks for the laughs...
[This Message was Edited on 08/02/2007]


Well-Known Member
Thanks alot Rafiki,

They were something else. I was going to say like someone else else mentionsed, that either the parents needed to go back to school because their spelling was horrible OR quite likey that the kids wrote it themselves. However, I do knows some adults that are terrible spellers too and they supposedly went to school - not sure how far they got though.

Also, others just had problems expressing themselves at all or correctly and that made the whole thing come out with a completely different meaning. However, they sure were hysterical 1!!

Thanks again for the bif laughs !




Well-Known Member
These are a laugh riot. Please excuse me for not responding earlier. I have a bad condition called ME. (Like Prince it was formerly known as something else.)




New Member
Those were hilarious. I especially liked the existential, "Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault."


New Member
every time I check on this thread I laugh at the excuses and then I laugh at/with you guys.

I don't know why I find this all so funny but I'm so happy that I'm not alone! The laptop is bouncing up and down so much I can hardly type!

Wiping away tears,



New Member
dear Rafiki,
thanks so much for the belly laughs, i too think they are the best medicine. I'll be sending this around--my husband is a teacher and getting his masters in reading/esl, so this is right up his alley.