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Too Depressed

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cv9901

New Member
Hi, I'm new talking to strangers. I know that I am depressed. But, there seem to be so many reasons. I was married for twenty-five years. I decided that I could'nt live under his control. I wasn't even allowed to have friends except for the church group ladies. Well God was watching over me. The church ladies group started a book called boundries. I saw how controlled my life was. I went to a shelter.
We have two children and he taught them to be disrespctful to me. My son is 11 and yesterday he blew up at me for the millionth time (Yes I have tried correcting him when I see it. The problem is I don't see the disrespect most of the time because i was force to ignore it for so long.) I lost it. I sent him to live with his dad for a month. I feel so guilty.
Any Advice is welcome
 

Sydnee

New Member
Hello,

Sometimes we get lost in making decisions and need advice on what to do. I have found that counselors are great at that or friends. This is a tricky situation. You did what you thought was right. During this period get a plan together, get some books from the library or talk to a counselor for suggestions on how to try to make things work when he comes back. I need to learn to be calm to show my kids how to stay calm. I struggle with this too. It's like you guys feed off each other. But, we are the adults here and need to grab at every resource to try to help discipline. Have you tried to get any type of counseling together?
[This Message was Edited on 05/08/2007]
 

cv9901

New Member
The kids didn't like the idea of talking to anyone.
I did make them go for about four months. Them we stopped due to finances. It also was hard to get them to open up.
Thanks for taking the time to answer
 

cv9901

New Member
the disrespect seems so hopeless to correct if I can"t see it. Any ideas on how to open my eyes to it more.
 

amber7

New Member
hello,

have you been to the doctor about how you are feeling? if your not sure whether or not you are depressed, try going on 'goldberg depression scale'- type it in to google. let us know how its going

amber x
 

cv9901

New Member
Thanks Amber,
I just took the test and scored a fifty. I guess I need to make an appointment. At least I have the name of a Dr. that helped me through a rough period of OCD in October.
 

amber7

New Member
its really good that you did the test and have a better idea now. the doctor will be able to help you to cope with an already difficult situation.

take care,

amber x
 

gingerbreadgirl

New Member
hey there

well you made the first and most important step which is to escape from that relationship.

and you should be very proud of yourself

as others have mentioned start counseling, i think it will also be important to eventually get your kids back into counseling when they are ready

it is good that you are standing up to your son's disrespect you can not let him think that it is acceptable behavior, as for feeling guilty for sending him to his dad, is it a bad place for him to be? or can you use this month to put yourself back together and then hopefully be better able to deal with his behavior?
[This Message was Edited on 05/08/2007]
 

cv9901

New Member
My son will be safe with his dad. I have a call in to a doctor for myself. The ex and I are in counciling he is willing to work at changing. I do not trust that he can change enough for us to become a family again. I am going through the counciling to maintain a relationship with him so that are children will not have to see us argue. I can air the problems in a safe enviornment. Thanks for listening
 
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